There wasn’t a specific moment wherein I learnt or realised that I was adopted. My understanding that I was adopted was helped by the fact that I was a Black child who had been adopted by two white parents. This, coupled with being brought up in a small exclusively White town in Somerset, inevitably provoked questions from many people. Questions such as, “Where do you come from?” and “Why are you here?” For a long time, these questions were at the root of how I felt about my identity. As a child and young person growing up I continually carried this innate feeling that I did not belong.

I can’t talk about my childhood without talking about my hair. In a community of 30 thousand people, my adopted brother and I were the only ones who had Afro hair. None of my family, friends, teachers or any other person that we knew had encountered this type of hair before. It would get tugged, matted, hacked and often simply left to grow feral. I remember countless times pulling small insects out of my hair that may have been lost in there for days. On the odd occasion when my parents would attempt to brush it, chunks of hair would be ripped from my scalp; let me tell you, that really hurts.

I understand that the issue of transracial adoption is a complex one. I frequently hear the opinion, “Surely it is better for a Black child to be adopted by White parents than stay in the care system.” The truth is that there are some huge and complex issues that need to be considered. I spent most of my childhood feeling that I didn’t fit in; I didn’t belong; I was different. This issue is deeper than just how my friends and family saw me. It is also about how I saw myself. When I looked around at my family, my home, my school and my community, I could not see anything that reflected my image. The music, fashion, language, hairstyles and culture did not represent anything of my heritage. The stories that were told of our ancestors and history did not recognise mine.

This is why I am so excited to be involved in supporting Home for Good with a particular focus on one of their three main priorities; to tackle racial disparity within the care system. Home for Good are passionate about finding a home for every child that needs one, but for this to be realised we need more families that represent every community in the UK.

My own personal journey took me away from Somerset and I ended up doing my first degree studying at Birmingham University. It was in this city that I began to find out about my heritage and explore my identity. It was also when I started to understand the racial injustice and discrimination within society. During this time, much of my childhood trauma around this issue began to make sense.

I now have the great privilege of being a Baptist minister and a community leader in a multi cultural neighbourhood in Birmingham. Over 20 years ago my wife and I set up a youth and community project in this neighbourhood and shortly after that we became a foster family. It was then that something surprising started to happen. Within both our home and our community project, a profound and beautiful space began to emerge. We felt like this space reflected some of the vision in Revelation 7; a space that holds people from different cultures, ethnicities, languages and nations. A space that enabled every child and young person to see themselves and feel free to express their identity. It’s important that I stress that the creation of this space is not down to our skill. Our role has been to simply be attentive to what God is doing and join in with His Holy spirit as She creates a space of healing, acceptance and love.

This vision is at the heart of Home for Good’s values and commitment, yet we have to recognise the reality that there are not enough families from these backgrounds coming forward as foster or adoptive parents. There are many complex reasons that has lead to a shortage of these families. I would encourage us to be brave enough to ask the difficult questions of ourselves and the current procedures and structures within the care system that are contributing to these barriers.

Over this next year I will be working with Home for Good to develop projects that will support families from all of our different cultures and ethnicities. In particular I want to (a) develop inclusive spaces where people with questions and ideas can come and have these important conversations, (b) listen and learn in order to understand more fully so that we can be a greater advocate for racial justice, and (c) develop a theology that allows us to better express the love of God to all of our children, who often hold within them deep sadness and trauma.

This is why I am so excited to have joined the Home for Good team and my hope is that all of our children, with their wonderful diversity, will find homes that reflect their images. I want to encourage families from all cultures to share in our vision, to find a home for every child that needs one, and I know that if I could talk to my young self, with his dry skin and matted hair, he would also be so excited about this vision.